Help me!

Joey is going through a "I need help" phase.

It was one of the first sentences we taught him, because it's useful and would help him get what he needed when he wasn't able to say anymore than that.
However - School has been mighty good for him, and his speech is now gaining quickly - just like I do when I eat a box of chocolates (What? like you never eat a box of chocolates??).

In our quest to teach him some independence we have learned that he's been abusing his "I need help" phrase.

He is fully capable of putting on boots when he wants to go outside and play in the backyard - but when I tell him to put his boots on so we can pick up the big boys from school, he dawdles and sits on the step and sticks one toe in and says "I need help"

Oh dear sweet Joey, I know you can do this yourself - but I have exactly 4 minutes to go before that bell rings and don't have time for you to piddle around pretending you can't do it - so I do it for him.

Lately I've been finding out just how much he has been using me - lazy little git.

I will admit that since he's the youngest - and yes he does have special needs and yes you do have to admit he's darn cute and angelic looking with dimples on both cheeks that can melt an iceberg with his sheer cuteness.....I have spoiled him. Not too much - but I do find that those cheeks are irresistable and kissable and he is so funny and has the ability to take any grumpy person and make them smile. One finds themselves wanting to do things for him, and when he speaks those three little words "I need help" and gives that little look with his blue eyes and golden hair falling into his face - well that's a lethal combination and he could practically rob a bank by going up to the teller and saying "I need money"
I mean, how can you not want to help when he says that "It's making trouble" - his universal phrase for a computer game that's not working or a leapster than needs new batteries, or pretty much anything that isn't working to his satisfaction.

But I digress - because I am on to his little game.

For 4-1/2 years we've done everything for him, and he's let us, and boy oh boy - we've been taken for a ride let me tell ya!

This past weekend I went on my tri-annual Boston Weekend. (ok, it's not really Tri-annual - but we did realize it was the 3rd time we've gone this year).
It's a girls weekend - where I drive down with my best friend Julie, and we leave our kids in the safe and capable hands of daddy (and Grandma) for 4 days while we road trip to Boston to meet with friends that live there, and other dear friends that fly in (From other states and other countries like England) for a weekend of shopping laughing hanging out and no kid responsibilities. It's a much needed mental health break for me - and I'm so thankful that my hubby is agreeable to my little weekend jaunts.

Now I know that my husband is perfectly capable of watching all the boys for a few days - albeit differently from me. There are however lots of little things that he doesn't know, since he doesn't do them on a regular daily basis.
Things like the actual school dismissal times, and which kid needs to be picked up first, and that Joey's graham cracker snacks must be pre-broken the correct way before packing them, or else he breaks them wrong and gets mad and refuses to eat them.
He does however know that Joey has issues with self dressing and has never accomplished such a task on his own - But perhaps because he is less bewitched by the face of cuteness than I am, he did tell him in the morning chaos to go and get dressed. And. Joey. Did.
No mummy around to help, so he went upstairs and picked out some clothes and put them on - underwear and everything.
I received a text message to tell me what he'd done.
And I was thrilled at his independence.
And sad at his new found independence, because he doesn't need me 100%
And Angry - Dude - this kid is independent!! How long has he been able to do this and we didn't know because we just did it for him.

So now I'm on to his game.
"I need help" he'll say
and I find myself saying "No you don't, you are a big boy - you can do it"
And he's doing it.

Two days ago I gave him some worksheets to do - his "homework" he calls it.
Normally at school he has an E.A. who sits with him and helps him with his worksheets.
I set him up at home at the dining room and showed him what to do - then went to the other room to watch "Prison Break" which I had DVR'd earlier.
Imagine my surprise when I went to check on him and he had finished his worksheets. They were all correct - and he had even done the cut and paste sheet - with scissors and glue - on his own. All he needed help with was getting the cap off of the glue. stick.
So now he's in for it - He has shown us what he is *truly* capable of and that means that even with all the progress he's made since September - there is much more to be made.
Starting Monday - since I volunteer in his class on Mondays, I am ratting him out!!
I'm telling his E.A. that he doesn't need 100% one-to-one supervision on everything. There are other kids in the class that can benefit from a teaching assistant - Joey is the only one in that class legally entitled to an E.A. but there's no reason why the rest of the class can't benefit from her presence - and in fact I think it will benefit him more if she's not ALWAYS helping him and helps some of the other kids in that class who are.....um.....somewhat difficult. In fact - I think that some of the other kids are in more need of help at times - and by controlling *their* behaviour issues - Joey has a better role model to emulate - and will progress even faster.

So yes he's cute. But he's not as helpless as he'd have us believe. He is lazy - but he comes by that honestly enough - he is after all my son! I do love him so!