You really need to change the wording on that.
I'm thinking something along the lines of "non-killing', or "tasty, but non-digestable, and *will* emerge at the other end".
Believe me, when it does, it IS toxic. In fact, the very words "Non-Toxic" scream out like an invitation, beckoning my young children to ingest. Non toxic - Pffffftt - May as well have a giant pair of lips that say "Eat Me, I won't really hurt you!" stamped on the side.
This is of course, a rant by me, after finding out why our crayons keep disappearing.
I do know that some of them (ok several, but who's counting) some of them were flushed down the toilet.(ok, I'm counting - 27 crayons) Still, our amazing wonderpack of 96 crayons of EVERY colour, including the rare vomit green, and ravioli stain orange has dwindled down to about 25 crayons - all broken except for a purple one that has miraculously escaped their attention.
Our pitiful crayon bucket has gotten progressively lighter, and today I found out why. It's not Matthew throwing them down the vents or Duncan peeling all the paper off - it's Joey eating them.
I found him with little crayon bits around his mouth in assorted colours.
Why do kids eat crayons? Do they really taste that much better than the macaroni I made for dinner that he turned up his nose at? I just don't see the draw. (yes yes, I'm very clever and made a funny pun - yay for me)
My kids don't really like to colour, but they all love crayons. Like I said earlier, Duncan (4) peels the paper off - Matthew (3)licks them and bites them, and flushes them, and buries them, and occasionally scribbles a bit with them on my walls, or on the floor or anywhere except paper unless of course it's a very important paper, or a page in a book that I'm reading. And Joey eats them. He's 17 months and stubbornly refused to let me get in his mouth to remove some of them.
At least 3 or 4 today, judging by the remnants I found on his face (Do crayons leave 'crumbs'? Hmmm maybe it was playdough)
That's not the worst thing he's eaten though, so I suppose I should be thankful that the vomit green and ravioli stain orange are no longer options for colouring with. Duncan did all of his "homework" in jet black.(yes he brings homework home in a duotang - pictures to colour, that's it so far) Hopefully his teacher doesn't think we have a depressed and dark kindergartener - really, his choices have been limited, what with 2 younger brothers that like to put crayons in their mouths. I'm sure he just used the dryest crayon in the bucket .
We haven't been brave enough to break out the non-toxic paint.
10 comments:
Oh that is funny (well it will be in 20 years when you recount it to them). I choose the call that green "infected nasel mucus", it gets the right picture across immediately.
Deb
they DO leave crumbs...somehow they turn into grated crayons when eaten ( isaac was very fond of purple crayons, only ever ate the purple ones) he now insists on only touching crayonswith no paper on ( ready to eat variety I suspect)and they come out the other end the same colour they went in! Almost worth taking a pic if Joey's nappy is rainbow coloured!!
Well there you go then Helen, My boys were simply saving that purple crayon for Isaac in the event that they should ever meet and have a crayon eating party, whilst not looking at each other.
Well at least they're not sticking them up their noses :)
Hugs
Julie
Your blog always gives me so much to look forward to...I wonder if mine will be a crayon eater. I know that my mom had to hide the paste when I was a kid, it smelled good so I was always eating it....she said now that was some gross poo.
Welcome to the club I guess! Aidan ate a blue crayon. Weird what happens to the chemical composition of a crayon when mixed with saliva isn't it??
It must have been the day for crayon issues. Aidan dumped out our bucket of crayons last night. About 40 katrillion crayon pieces spread from one end of the living room to the other. It took him about an hour, but he got them all picked up!!
~Lisa~
I'm pulling a Mr. Happy, and replying to replies;
Deb; you really know your colours - I'm impressed. No mistaking what colour you are talking about when you put it that way!
The Other Me ; I don't think I could bring myself to take pictures of rainbow coloured poop, as enticing as it sounds. A mental picture will have to suffice
Ghoolie; They don't need to stick crayons up their nose - fingers work just great thanks, and have added flexability and movement for really digging around up there.
Jennifer; Always happy to give you a heads up on what you're about to face in the very near future. Hopefully you won't have to deal with chocolate syrup, but be prepared to get that steam cleaner - Just in case.
Linna - Irelyn grew out of it??? no fair - Matthew is 3 and is worse than Joey! Beware of the middle child!
Mamatink Thanks for the warm welcome into the crayon club. I'm running for president next year! If only we had a nickle for every broken crayon we found on the floor......
Stevieb I would suggest the new calorie-reduced crayons for you. All the taste, and half the calories - perfect for keeping that svelte body in tip top shape! Beware of the waxy aftertaste though. You can get rid of this by chugging a beer afterwards.
He he, I have nothing clever to add. :) This post just made me smile Jenn. Some how with four children, I missed having a crayon eater. Of course they weren't perfect either. ;)
My son prefers the taste of play-doh over crayola.
Julie - Glad to bring a smile to your face.
Mr. happy - Playdoh is softer, I'll admit, but crayons have more fibre.
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